Andrew Schneider — Writer
Episodes 17
Freud's Dilemma
From Showtime:
Chris finds himself dumped by his girlfriend and questions what women really want. On a location shoot for a music video, he is reminded of his ex-girlfriend by Nedra, an attractive, but rigid production accountant on his music video shoot. Nedra seems to have absolutely no interest in Chris when he tries to talk to her, but then every night she does a strip-tease in the hotel room across the alley from his, apparently oblivious to him. Unnerved, Chris consults his psychologist mother (who plays herself in a cameo,) but Dr. Isaak will only tell him to come to terms with his own libido.
Further complicating matters is actress Bai Ling, who co-stars in the video with Chris. She arrives on set with a head full of insecurities and a jealous kick boxer boyfriend. Not that anyone else in the band is doing any better with affairs of the heart. Anson's romance with Jodie, a young horsewoman, fizzles when he finds himself intimidated by the thought that she'll compare him t
Read MoreCrimes and Punishment
From Showtime:
In an attempt to win favor with his new love interest and duet partner, movie star Minnie Driver, Chris agrees to take care of her English sheepdog, Otto. Unfortunately, Chris forgets Otto's special food. Before he knows it, the pet rabbit, Mr. Whiskers, who belongs to the little girl next door, lies dead and covered in dirt, apparently a victim of the hungry and oversized dog. Desperate, Chris tries to cover for Otto, washing the dirt from the bunny's fur and blow-drying him to make it look as though Mr. Whiskers died of natural causes.
Meanwhile, Chris's manager Yola and his keyboard player Anson are having their own troubles. Yola's got problems in the boardroom when her hot-shot colleague Cody makes her feel old and out of touch. Anson's problems are in the bedroom. His latest girlfriend Carol, is hot, but she's deeply religious and she's wracked by guilt whenever they make love. Anson finds her innocence and tortured spirituality strangely arousing, until he too get
Read MoreIt's the Music, Stupid
From Showtime:
For a long time, Chris has been stalked by Kim, a mousy fan who is so obsessed with him that she camps outside his house and tries to win him over with homemade banana bread. She suddenly disappears, leaving behind only a red tennis shoe. Chris is at first relieved, but then, he begins to worry and hires Ray,a musician-turned-private detective to track her down.
And Kim's disappearance isn't the only mystery. At an auction of celebrity memorabilia, Chris gets into a bidding war with Joe Walsh over a guitar owned by Elvis' sideman Scotty Moore, only to be beaten out by an anonymous phone bidder. Yola is determined to find out who got the guitar, so much so that she sabotages a blossoming relationship with Denver Lane, the antique expert and auctioneer who oversaw the sale.
Anson, meanwhile, is doing some sabotaging of his own. When his father Merrill, a demanding figure who doesn't approve of his music, asks him and his sister Marissa, to play a piece by Brahms at their
Read MoreTomorrowland
From Showtime:
When his boyhood musical idol, trumpeter Jo Jo Burnett dies suddenly after playing with Silvertone, Chris is shocked to learn that he left no friends or family. Determined not to face a similar fate when he grows old, Chris invites his girlfriend Celeste to go on tour with him. It's a fine way of showing his commitment to the relationship, but it is not, as it turns out, a good idea. Especially since being on the bus allows Celeste to catch a glimpse of the groupies and breast-flashing female fans and the juvenile antics of the other musicians.
Meanwhile, Anson, always the party dog of the band, is having his own crisis of faith, sparked by a young woman's observation that his teeth were beginning to yellow. And Yola, who's also decided to come along on the tour, is making a mess of things with her micro-management.
Read MoreDancin'
From Showtime:
Chris has never been much of a dancer, but when he catches a glimpse of Jenna, the beautiful woman who runs the dance class Hershel and Roly have been attending, he signs up. Unfortunately, instead of getting to know Jenna better, he's partnered with Irene, a severe and unpleasant woman in her 50's who works as a therapist. When Jenna gives him a few quick tips after class, Chris has Fred Astaire fantasies, but those vanish when she asks if, as a favor to her, he would accompany Irene to her daughter's wedding. Chris reluctantly agrees, only to learn later that Irene is really a dominatrix named ""Mistress Livia.""
And Chris isn't the only one who finds himself in a world of kink. When Cody persuades Yola to mentor Lauren, a friend of his from Harvard, he neglects to mention they're sleeping together. Not only that, Yola must listen as Lauren describes, in explicit detail, all of Cody's exotic sexual trick, none of which he employed when he slept with her.
Meanwhile,
Read MoreStorytime
From Showtime:
When Chris tears his hamstring surfing and is confined to a wheelchair, Yola hires a physical therapist to help nurse him back to health. The therapist, a beautiful Chinese woman named Debbie Fung catches Chris' eye, but when he makes a play for her, she ignores him. Maybe it's the rejection, maybe it's the scary old movies he's been watching, but Chris starts to notice that there's something strange about Debbie. First, she won't tell him where she's from. Then he walks in on her while she's practicing Kung Fu. When he discovers another Chinese woman lurking in his garage, Chris is convinced something sinister is going on.
To add to the intrigue, Anson gets wind of the fortune that, according to urban legend, is buried in the secret tunnels under Bimbo's. He heads down to look for it and when Kenney comes along to get his keys back from Anson, the two of them are trapped in the subterranean passages. Hershel, meanwhile, has an idea for a movie, but can't get anyo
Read MoreOur Place
From Showtime:
Chris is thrown for a loop when Rhonda, the winner of a radio station's 'Win a Date with Chris Isaak' contest seems to be a man in a dress. When Rhonda shows up backstage at Bimbo's just before Chris and the band are to play a live radio broadcast, Chris suspects that he/she is part of a practical joke, but as they get acquainted, Chris discovers that Rhonda is a real fan, both of his music and of vintage rockabilly. At least Rhonda's certainly better company than his old flame Tanya, the DJ who is hosting the broadcast and who keeps asking strangely personal questions during the interview segments.
To further complicate matters, Chris' guest star on the broadcast, Sheryl Crow, still hasn't arrived. Yola tries to manage the crisis without completely neglecting her new boyfriend, Sam, who has given up a chance to see Kathleen Battle in ""Porgy and Bess"" to come to the show.
Anson, meanwhile, invites his classical music snob father to the show and discovers a secret from
Read MoreThe Devil Made Me Do It
From Showtime:
Chris, convinced he has finally found the right woman, suggests that rock journalist Steffie Furst move some of her things into his place. For Chris, this is a big step, perhaps too big a step. Complicating matters is his growing resentment of the generous attention Steffie pays to the subject of her latest magazine assignment, the good-looking Stephan Jenkins (Third Eye Blind.) But Kenney turns that jealousy into suspicion when he suggests that Steffie might be writing a covert and intimate article about Chris, instead.
Yola is caught off guard when she finds out how serious Chris really is about Steffie. She overcompensates by striking up an awkward friendship with her. But when she accidentally sets Steffie's silk jacket on fire and later runs into her with her car, Yola wonders if her subconscious is trying to tell her something. Meanwhile, a shapely young female walking down the street catches Anson's eye and he sets out in dogged pursuit. But when he catches
Read MoreRat in the House
From Showtime:
While Chris and an attractive woman snuggle together watching a late night movie on TV, a brown rat sporting a long tail, comes into view and sends his date scurrying from the house. In the days that follow, he becomes frantic as every feeble attempt to catch it fails to rid him of his uninvited houseguest.
Chris soon suspects there may be more than one rat to deal with when Yola introduces him to her latest romantic interest, Josh, a handsome, worldly, good-at-everything guy. She invites Josh to be her houseguest but Chris, ever protective, is sure he is leeching off her trusting nature, and her wallet. Yola believes she's found Mr. Perfect and resents Chris' interference, until she sees her beautiful apartment turning into a rat's nest.
Meanwhile, Anson hurts himself in Kung Fu class, rendering his right hand useless for at least two weeks. Annoyed that Anson would be so careless, Chris instructs Yola to find an interim keyboard player. When Chris hires Damien, a
Read MoreHell Is Other People
From Showtime:
Bret Michaels, lead singer for the rock band Poison, is producing a movie and may have a part that's perfect for Chris. To help him decide, Bret wants to hang out together. Eager for the part, Chris puts his best foot forward. But his principles waiver when a neighbor begins building a deck too close to Chris' house. To maintain his privacy and his relationship with the guy next door, Chris makes an anonymous call to the building department. Feeling like a snitch, Chris realizes that the effects of his underhanded tactics are extending much further than his own backyard.
Kenney loves everything about Janine and he's blissfully happy. Then, during a mid winter fishing trip with the band, Kenney discovers that Janine had a previous relationship… with Anson! To make matters worse, Anson offers him inside information on what gets Janine sexually charged, turning his seething anger into a full rage. Kenney's struggle to come to terms with this incomprehensible truth p
Read MoreGimme Shelter
From Showtime:
Chris secretly longs for a few days to unwind when the demands of his work start piling up. Instead, he must prepare for a visit from television host Lucia Kent, who plans to broadcast her show live from his house. To spruce things up, Chris decided to install a fountain and, ever frugal, begins the work himself. While digging in his backyard, he uncovers a hatch leading to a 1950's bomb shelter. Later, excited by his historical find, Chris invites Yola, Kenney, Roly, and Hershel to go below. But when the inside latch breaks off, trapping them all inside, it seems assured that Chris will have an endless holiday!
Meanwhile, Anson can't think or see straight when Julia, a hot new waitress at Bimbo's convinces him that he would be more appealing with green eyes. But the new tinted contact lenses don't do anything for his looks, his vision, or his love life. Dejected, he heads over to Chris' house to discover everyone inexplicably missing.
Yola isn't sure how she feel
Read MoreJust Us Kids
From Showtime:
Backstage, following a great show with guest star Paul Stanley of the rock group KISS, it's revealed that Chris has never thrown a party. A few days later, when news comes that Chris's latest album has gone platinum, he seizes the opportunity to reciprocate by throwing a big celebration party. Skeptical that he can pull it off, Yola offers to help. But Chris is still worried. Party costs are mounting. Worse still, Chris is convinced that no one will show up.
Meanwhile, as Yola begins dating her high school sweetheart Kyle, she's cautiously optimistic that this may be something more than the usual six week, doomed from the start, romance. When she's forced to find alternate supervision for her dog Jimi, Kyle pulls some strings to get him into the exclusive Greenbriar Canine Day Care. But Jimi's expulsion from doggie day care the very same day could have serious repercussions for Yola's blossoming relationship.
Anson's father, Professor Drubner, begrudgingly extends an inv
Read MoreThe Little Mermaid
Chris receives an extra $20 when he visits his local bank's automatic teller machine, and feels as though he won the lottery. But when he shares the happy news with Mona, she annoys him by insisting the money be returned. Believing he came by his windfall honestly, he refuses. Later, Chris is shocked to discover that Mona has vanished from her lair. When he runs into a girl named Stacy, who looks just like his missing muse, he wonders if Stacy is really Mona, determined to give him a morality lesson.
After moving into a new house, Cody hires Yola's housekeeper, Mihaela, after Yola recommends her for the job; unaware that she only did so out of spite. Much to her dismay, however, Yola finds out that Mihaela and Cody might be a better fit than she'd originally anticipated...
Meanwhile, Anson and Tanya wake up in their Las Vegas hotel room after a night of hard partying to find that part of the evening's activities included a wedding...
Read MoreA Little Help From My Friends
Chris is in for quite a jolt when Gloria Estefan arrives in San Francisco to perform with him and the band. During rehearsals she showers the guys with compliments, impressing them with her kindness and lack of pretense. Though initially flattering and supportive, the real reason for her visit is soon revealed, though not before the seeds of rebellion have been sown between Chris and the band. To make matters worse, Chris, who always shuns caffeine, is tricked into drinking Gloria's special blend of Cuban coffee, and now can't seem to function without it.
Yola, meanwhile, has her hands full dealing with a pizza company that has illegally used one of Chris' songs in their advertising spots. As she works to prepare Chris for his deposition, she notices his erratic, caffeine-induced behavior, and suspects it may be linked to Gloria. By the time she arrives to take him for his all-important deposition several days later, her worst fears are realized... Chris' Cuban coffee addiction ha
Read MoreRivals
When Michael Bublé stops by to perform at Bimbo's with Chris and the band, his beautiful manager, Olivia, immediately catches Chris' eye. Though clearly attracted to one another, both initially have concerns about mixing business with pleasure. Chris shares his interest in Olivia with Yola, whose lukewarm response to the match is taken as approval by a love-struck Chris.
Yola, meanwhile, is distraught over the disappearance of her dog, Jimi, after he runs out of her apartment when the front door is accidentally left open. As Jimi begins a dog's-eye tour of the city, Yola calls Chris and enlists his help to look for the runaway. It soon becomes apparent though, after the pair spends several days ringing doorbells, talking to strangers, jumping over fences and falling in mud puddles that little Jimi may not really want to be found.
Anson also has issues of his own to deal with, at the moment. It seems his dad volunteered him to help an opera singer prepare for a recital; something h
Read MoreCriminal Favors
Chris and Olivia's relationship is going great, until he meets her good friend - and ex-husband - Neal.
Read MoreRun, Yola, Run
Chris must do some damage control when his girlfriend, Olivia, arranges for Richie Sambora to perform with him, without checking with Yola first.
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