Meet an annoying French prankster from the Middle Ages, witness bizarre Aztec food on Historical Masterchef, see what happens when Queen Elizabeth I needs the toilet, and learn how not to impress a woman in Victorian times -a painful lesson in manners. The truth about Dick Turpin in song; certainly no New Romantic.

A Welsh prince from the Middle Ages has a very stupid death, King Louis XVI and Marie Antoinette go on Historical Wife Swap with some starving French peasants, a Tudor peasant gets a super-hot makeover from Historical Fashion Fix, and Queen Cleopatra sings about her femme fatale reputation.

Robert Walpole struggles to talk to England's German king, a Scottish sportsman attacks dead cows in the Highland Games, American inventor Paul Revere demonstrates his gunpowder toothpaste, and the Roman Emperors channel the King of Pop in their musical argument over who's baddest of all.

The Vikings launch their advert for 'We Sell Any Monk', Queen Elizabeth I surprises her court with some very odd laws, the sacrifice obsessed Aztec priests sing their gruesome disco song, and we discover the Roman equivalent of text messaging.

We rejoice in the odd marriage of Mary I and Philip II of Spain, whilst a pirate chef disgusts the judges on Historical Masterchef and a Stone Age man appears on Dragons' Den with his innovative inventions. Plus, the Victorian paramedics offer their bizarre medical advice to a modern patient.

The people of Strasbourg literally can't stand still with 'Dance Fever', HHTV presenter Fearne Polyester reports from a bizarre Greek festival, two Celtic warriors hold a rap battle to see who is best at boasting, and King Charles II meets the man who tried to steal the Crown Jewels.

Savage Songs compilation. Featuring the hip hop battle of the boasting Celts, pop superstar Cleopatra, rock rebel William Wallace, the soulful Suffragettes, the funky Aztec priests, the crooning caveman, bad boy heartthrob Dick Turpin, pouting Richard III, the children of the Victorian workhouses, and the many, many, merry monarchs!