Here we are already at the penultimate episode of the series. I remembered the later episodes of the series being not much, but actually this wasn’t half bad. There were more positives than negatives. Let’s start with the negatives first.

The first victim ages drastically while jogging. This is done by do laying one shot over another and it’s really bad. I know we’re all spoiled by modern morphing technology but this wasn’t even good for the 70’s. Thankfully, it’s the only one done so poorly. The next victim, female, is shown doing toe touches. She bobs down out of camera range and then bobs back up looking older each time. Except for one brief obvious edit, the transition work is smooth. She even then sees her elderly reflection and is so shocked she stumbles back over her balcony and plummets to her death in a nifty scene. Another man ages while walking; I believe they used cutaways to accomplish that. And the fourth one is just shown having mercifully aged in her sleep with Carl’s clever voiceover analysis attached.

Another negative is the coincidence factor. Carl stumbles across a lot of these bodies because he’s doing a story on swinging singles of all things. Also, Helen of Troy’s temple is strictly low budget. A circular room with some busts on pillars and an altar of sorts in the middle; Kolchak’s attempt to destroy it is almost comical. And the makeup job on Cathy Lee Crosby isn’t great. She has obvious bags under the eyes in half the scenes, which vanish after the third victim if I recall. But the rest of her still looks good. They should have made her look worse, and then slowly improve each time a sacrifice died. But except for the disappearing bags, I never noticed much difference.

Speaking of differences, a major cog in the story was that one of the sacrifices had a glass eye and Helen didn’t notice. As far as I know, glass eyes don’t move. So someone like Helen, scanning people for perfection would have to have been half-blind not to notice it. (Pun intended)

Now the positives: Good casting as usual. Cathy Lee Crosby truly looks like a goddess. I liked how the Greek cab driver (Demosthenes – aka George Savalas, Telly’s brother) looked at the photo and said he’d give everything for a chance at her, to which Carl replied that seemed to be the going rate – everything. Ironically, the photo Kolchak showed the cab driver was one he had taken very quickly so that Helen wouldn’t notice, yet it was almost perfect. Last week, he took a picture of an unmoving weapon and was told that it was way out of focus.

Gordy the Ghoul was back (hurrah!), but oddly claimed that Kolchak never paid him. Last time around we saw money change hands not once but twice. Granted, Carl swiped money back from the other morgue attendant and Gordy did say he’d heard from others that Kolchak didn’t come through, so maybe that’s what it was all about. Anyway, this time Gordy wanted a portable color TV for the morgue. Carl haggled it down to an 18 inch B&W used TV. We never did find out if he got it for him or not.

For a change of pace, the police sergeant this week was new and young, played by ex-Dobie Gillis Dwayne Hickman. At first, he’s willing to work with Kolchak despite all his co-workers saying he was a pinwheel. But later he relents when said co-workers present him with a real pinwheel “for a pinhead.” Carl doesn’t help matters when he tries to tell the sergeant that those old people who are dropping dead were young people who aged overnight.

Finally, Kathleen Freeman plays a matchmaker whom Carl goes to for research on both stories and she tries to hook him up, not realizing he’s not looking for a wife (or even a girlfriend apparently.) He later palms her off on the young sergeant after the detective abandons him. (Trivia: Kathleen Freeman was seriously considered for the role of Alice on THE BRADY BUNCH before Ann B. Davis landed the part.) She was very funny as well. Loved the back and forth dialogue where he asks her a question for the story, and then she asks him a personal question.

Another nice twist is that Kolchak was actually working on another story – one on swinging singles. He wasn’t just avoiding it either. When Vincenzo looked at his “rough, rough draft,” I was waiting for him to yell, “This is guff about an old jogger,” but instead it was actually a singles story and Tony just said it needed a little more work. Carl actually did work on the story, questioning Bella Sarkof about it and sneaking into a swinging singles resort with the cops, which led him to the second victim. It’s like he tried to do his job, but the aging youths kept sneaking up on him. Even though the story wasn’t ready on Thursday night (for Friday morning), I wouldn’t find it hard to believe that Carl managed to spit and polish it the next morning right in the nick of time.

Oh, and the office gang was great, especially Emily. After Ron said that with exercise a 90 year old could do anything a 19 year old could, her priceless look said, “The heck you can!” Later, she passes by the office just as Tony shouts “Nobody cares about 90 year-old people,” leading to another priceless look. Tony is hilarious as he tries to show off losing five pounds and no one notices. Later he gets stuck in a yoga position and has to call for Kolchak’s help in a pleading voice. Leave it to Carl to reach out to him with his mayonnaise-covered hand from trying to get a ring off his finger. Vincenzo’s hand slips out faster than a greased pig. I’m laughing just remembering it. Finally, as Kolchak runs off to destroy the temple and Tony is yelling his, “Kolchak, come back here” line, he then turns to the cab driver and says “and what are you doing here?”

Kolchak’s ploy of wrecking the temple doesn’t work, but his research on the case saves him as he points out that Helen of Troy is trying to pass his imperfect self off as a perfect sacrifice. Then he points out that one of the other sacrifices had the glass eye. This angers the god Hecate who summons up thunder and lightning and rain and then turns Helen to stone. Victory for Mr. K once again, and he didn’t even need a blessed battle axe or silver bullets or a wooden stake, just the glass eye he pilfered from the dead man’s effects.

Like I said, more positives than negatives. Enough to give this one 7 Olympian rings that you should never put on your finger as they can be very hard to get back off.

OK, I used an inaccurate example comparing MaxMatch to Tinder. I forgot that back in the 1970s there was this notion of selecting people for dates with the use of a computer whose program would find similarities between two candidates and match them in the hopes of finding a compatible match. Also, there was the weird notion that your date would be chosen by somebody else, either the computer or the dating service experts, while now, even if we have compatibility tools available, the choice is always the participants'.

Anyway, at this point, the show was on its last legs. The same formula would be used with the same results. Again we have a new variety of monster, but the investigation itself lacked any real bright spots. Well, at least the writers started trying different dynamics between Kolchak and the police, so instead of the belligerent stickler to police regulations, the officer in charge was initially amiable, but it didn't take him long to get disappointed in Kolchak and include him in his blacklist of inconvenient reporters.

The scenes in which they showed the villainess praying to her goddess and the victims dying was repetitive and happened too many times just the very same way, losing its impact. And, even though turning a young person into an old crone by magic is something I've always found quite disturbing, the death scenes themselves were never particularly scary.

A couple of coincidences increased the episode's hilarity factor. First, helen of Troy always managed to get the moon in perfectly alignment with the central pane in the temple's sky window. it was always just right. I think it's the same phenomenon by means of which every quaint old hotel room in Paris has a window which perfectly frames a view of the Eiffel Tower.

Another funny notion is that Kolchak managed to find the one person who knew exactly what Helen of Troy truly looked like, and that Helen Surtees' photograph was in Helen of Troy's exact likeness. Supposedly, the actress who playd the villainess should've looked like this. Except for the fact that this bust was sculpted in 1807, so probably the artist was also guessing. Well, I'd say his guess was as good as anybody's.

The episode missed a great opportunity to shed some light on Karl's sex and love life, but the story was of no avail. The best we got to learn is that Kolchak is sure he doesn't want to get married, and that he's 100% focused on his stories. That quirky matchmaker's efforts were of no use.

I liked the ending. It turns out Kolchak is quite aware of his shortcomings and knows he's imperfect. Helen underestimated goddess Hecate thinking she would accept subpar sacrifices. Even evil gods do have standards!

And in the end Kolchak realized there was nothing to print about and at this point he should've learned that that's how all his stories about supernatural phenomena end.

I feel this episode sucked a few years of my life. It gets 4 used 18" black-and-white television sets that will never be delivered to their promised destination.

This is fairly useless, introducing Greek Gods into the series is problematic for me. They are well known figures of myth and legend are we supposed to assume all Greek Gods are real? We can't assume Hecate is and Zeus, Apollo et al aren't. Who will Karl face in the finale? The Easter Bunny!

The ending was pretty lame too, this all powerful god does Kolchak's bidding because he knocked over a few statues. 2/10

@HawkMan47 said:

The ending was pretty lame too, this all powerful god does Kolchak's bidding because he knocked over a few statues. 2/10

Actually, the goddess took revenge on Helen because she had duped her. Helen had offered Kolchak as a sacrifice, which is bad enough imperfect the way he is, and, on top of that, a man with a glass eye. And, like a cat, there's just so much abuse a god will take.

I liked this one. Not just because the bad girl was hot.

When Carl recorded Helen secretly and made a telltale noise, I just can't see her dismissing it that easily just because she didn't see him in a room with something he could hide behind, but that's sort of a sneaking cliche that was supposed to work on 70s TV.

When he asked Tony what the vitamin E was for, was that reply a biceps flex or a dirty gesture?

All in all, the aging techniques used in this were well within what was accepted at the time. Only problem is that a middle-aged guy among the joggers didn't look enough like the others to pass for the same guy at a different age. Otherwise nicely done.

I like that Kolchak's information source here was a cab driver with academic knowledge above and beyond his lot in life. I can relate to that and enjoy.

Rather lame attempt to destroy the temple. Not much actual damage done. Mostly just knocking things over that could be righted without much effort than it took to trash the place. Lucky for him he made the case against Helen for making unfit sacrifices to her goddess. You don't slight the gods of Mt. Olympus and get away with it.

All in all, one of my favorite eps I've seen so far. 8 bosses in need of immediate help out of a beginner's yoga pose.

@BobPeters61 said:

I liked this one. Not just because the bad girl was hot.

She was WONDERful!

When he asked Tony what the vitamin E was for, was that reply a biceps flex or a dirty gesture?

Biceps flex, of course. But to make it clearer, tony should've made the sound of a volcano exploding.

All in all, the aging techniques used in this were well within what was accepted at the time. Only problem is that a middle-aged guy among the joggers didn't look enough like the others to pass for the same guy at a different age. Otherwise nicely done.

What was the deal with all those young people anyway? All seemed crazy about exercising. But apparently older people don't need that.

Rather lame attempt to destroy the temple. Not much actual damage done. Mostly just knocking things over that could be righted without much effort than it took to trash the place.

What did you guys expect? Dynamite? Arson?

@mad-pac said:

What did you guys expect? Dynamite? Arson?

Sledge hammer? A bull dozer would have been too much to ask for.

Well only one more of the great intro to go. I was thinking it would be great if in the final episode they redid that sequence as showed us what Kolchak looks to see.

So we open with a hideously old woman, look at the eye bags. Then our first victim who looked to me like Jimmy Carter at least in transition. I don't have a great awareness of what Jimmy Carter looks like but that's what my brain told me he looked like. He then ends up looking like Biff in Back to the Future Part 2. I thought the ageing effect was pretty good, not perfect but not a bad transition.

We then get some very bad moving and handling. They don't lift in tandem, they will pay for that in later life. Oh and a ring is left on the grass.

It's early doors on the office scenes.
A wonderfully proud Tony shows off his weight loss. I know he hasn't become super slim but they could at least be nice to him.
Carl shows himself to be a great friend, tempting Tony to break his diet to distract him from his draft. Though that donut did look so good.

@BobPeters61 wrote:
When he asked Tony what the vitamin E was for, was that reply a biceps flex or a dirty gesture?

I think Tony was giving us the gun show. The look on his face was brilliant.

Next we have the owner of a matching website played by Kathleen Freeman, who I always remember from Innerspace where she plays "The Dream Woman" in Martin Shorts dream of work. It seems Kolchak is actually pursuing his assigned story. He learns of the big competition on the dating block Maxmatch.

We meet our next victim Cynthia who I thought looked like a young Liz Hurley, very nice. She does seem to do a cartwheel off the balcony rather that stumble off so I guess she stayed nimble even into premature old age.
We then see the results Olay of Ulay/Olay would love to achieve as our hideous crone from the opening is amazingly transformed into a beautiful young woman.
Kolchak visits the scene and discovers the ring which drops from Cynthia's body.
We meet our police representative for this week. He seems very amiable. I have no idea what being called a "pinwheel" means which is Kolchak's rep among the cops.

It is off to the morgue and the Ghoul is back. Kolchak seems obsessed by the ring. It seems that could easily have been a red herring, would he really attach such importance to a loose ring.
Well it is good he did as it ends up linking the 2 deaths. The Ghoul seems to have stopped running his bookies business and is now after a TV.

Out of interest the price of a black and white 18 inch screen in 1970 would apparently be around $200 new, a colour would be $350. That's some expensive information.

We then return to our mysterious blonde, Helen Surtees, who it turns out runs MaxMatch a dating system for attractive people. It turns out you get one of Kolchak's rings when you become an Olympian. Not an olympic athlete but an elite attractive date.
Lance is our next victim apparently about to go off on a tennis date, which I did not know was a thing.
Sadly we never get to see how this type of date works as he ages on route.
Apparently Cathy Lee Crosby was a former tennis pro so she could have at least given him a set or two first.

Meanwhile Kolchak has tracked down our first victim and learns he wasn't quite so perfect having had a glass eye. You would have thought that Helen would have noticed this.

@mad-pac wrote:
She was WONDERful!

Apparently not very observant though. I did not realize she was in that role before Lynda Carter. I've never watched the show much so Gal Gadot can be my Wonder Woman.

Carl makes his way to MaxMatch. Helen turns on the charm after she sees Kolchak's Ring. Carl drops some information about the cases attempting to bait the hook.
I like that he re-uses the accidental photograph technique, it's clearly worked for him before so it's nice to see it again.
He even learns from last week, this time snapping his secret photo without engaging his flash.

@brimfin wrote:
Ironically, the photo Kolchak showed the cab driver was one he had taken very quickly so that Helen wouldn’t notice, yet it was almost perfect. Last week, he took a picture of an unmoving weapon and was told that it was way out of focus.

Yes Kolchak has really improved his game this week. She is very photogenic so maybe the photo takes itself.

@mad-pac wrote:
Another funny notion is that Kolchak managed to find the one person who knew exactly what Helen of Troy truly looked like, and that Helen Surtees' photograph was in Helen of Troy's exact likeness.

I did think this was a bit ridiculous, he could have been a bit more vague saying she resembles a statue he saw and it would have come off better. He was so insistent it just seemed silly.

We return to the office so Kolchaks ring can be well lubricated but the cab driver can't get it off, heh.
I did like the gag with Tony and the mayonnaise.

So it's into our finale. The temple set was pretty good, and at least the statues crack when Kolchak smashes them up.
In the end Kolchak is humble about himself realizing he would not be an appropriate sacrifice and reveals Helen has mucked up before. These must not be very knowing gods.
The show obeys the old rule, attractive woman, wearing white just add water.
I remember noticing this in one of the Bond movies when Denise Richard's changes into a white top, few scenes later, she's in a sinking sub, Oh Hollywood.
Otherwise the finale was a bit a damp squib (sorry) but served it's purpose to wrap things up.

So pretty good episode, some nice effects and moved at a good pace.
7 ring related double entendres too many in this review out of 10

@mad-pac said:

Cathy Lee Crosby ... Diana Prince

Telly Savalas ... Kaz (as Demosthenes)

Hayes MacArthur ... Buddy Amicus, "frescorts" service owner

I never did get back to this last week, but here goes:

As other reviewers hinted, Cathy Lee Crosby once did a TV movie/backdoor pilot for a series about Wonder Woman - still sporting her regular blonde hair. It didn't sell, but of course Lynda Carter succeeded in selling the concept some years later.

It was George Savalas, Telly's brother, who played the cab driver. He was also a regular on Telly's series KOJAK, billed as Demosthenes then as well.

Buddy Amicus is another PUSHING DAISIES reference, so I can't tell you much more beyond that.

@brimfin said:

@mad-pac said:

Cathy Lee Crosby ... Diana Prince

Telly Savalas ... Kaz (as Demosthenes)

Hayes MacArthur ... Buddy Amicus, "frescorts" service owner

I never did get back to this last week, but here goes:

As other reviewers hinted, Cathy Lee Crosby once did a TV movie/backdoor pilot for a series about Wonder Woman - still sporting her regular blonde hair. It didn't sell, but of course Lynda Carter succeeded in selling the concept some years later.

It was George Savalas, Telly's brother, who played the cab driver. He was also a regular on Telly's series KOJAK, billed as Demosthenes then as well.

Buddy Amicus is another PUSHING DAISIES reference, so I can't tell you much more beyond that.

Right! Buddy Amicus was the owner of "Frescorts", a rent-a-friend service, which is the closest to a dating service I could find as a reference to past shows.