Opie complains to Andy about how his new history teacher Ms. Crump is a mean old woman who likes to assign extra homework. Andy tells Opie it's not important if he doesn't know every answer, which leaves Opie believing history isn't important. Now Andy has to show Opie, and his class, how much history matters before Ms. Crump decides to quit.

When Opie and his friends are scammed into selling a useless skin ointment, Barney and Gomer try to help convince the company their product is more valuable than they think. When the scheme backfires, however, the whole gang learns a lesson in the art of the deal.

While on a camping trip with Opie and his friends, Barney brags to Gomer about his outdoor skills and promptly gets them lost in the woods. When Andy finally does find them, he and Gomer hatch a plan to save Barney the embarrassment and prove to everyone what a mountain man he really is.

Opie develops a crush on his teacher, Ms. Crump, and Andy sees that the only way to get Opie to forget about it is to admit to him that he and Helen are an "item."

New height and weight requirements go into effect for all law enforcement officers, which threatens to put Barney out of a job unless Andy can figure out a way to throw around some much-needed weight.

Aunt Bee's sister Nora and her family come to visit and drive everybody crazy. When Nora's husband starts going around town acting like a police officer, Andy decides to give him a taste of the life of a real lawman.

Opie goes to the carnival to try and win a present for Andy's birthday but ends up spending all his money on a crooked shooting gallery. When Andy hears about it, he visits the gallery himself to teach the operators a lesson in straight shooting.

A wild west show comes to town featuring a wimpy man who is said to be related to Wyatt Earp.

Opie wants to attend his first dance but first must learn how to dance.