Bobby and Connie get in trouble at school. They skirt their ensuing punishment and are joined by Joseph, as they head to "The Caves". Hank and Kahn quickly pursue them, knowing that the caves are Arlen's make-out point.

Hank struggles to portray himself and his life as that of a stereotypical Texan cowboy's for a Hollywood cowboy movie fan in order to secure a business deal for Strickland Propane.

After Hank realizes that his new employee at Strickland Propane is a drug addict, he can't fire him, because drug addiction counts as a disability under the Americans With Disabilities Act.

Hank is outraged when he attends a lawn mower focus group and discovers that the new model of his favorite mower has been turned into an upgraded "yuppified" version.

After Hank and Bobby visit the Dallas Cowboys training camp in Wichita Falls, Hank decides to make a video that will convince the team to move their camp to Arlen.

Bill meets Cajun relatives and Hank competes for $1 million in a beer promotion at a football game in New Orleans.

Hank and Peggy are caught in the middle after Strickland's wife catches him with his girlfriend.

Bobby's act of heroism leads the Hills to a meeting with candidate George Dub-Ya, who turns Hank's vote from sure to tentative with the shake of a hand.

Dale plans to buy Nancy a face-lift by suing a tobacco company, which countersues--and carelessly bugs his home.

After Connie becomes a victim of reverse discrimination, Kahn gives up his hopes and dreams and embraces the life of a hillbilly.

When Reverend Stroup gives the Hills' pew at the Arlen First Methodist Church to another family, Hank and his family decide to find another church. A slick pastor tries to bribe the Hills into worshipping at his Megachurch.

Peggy loses her job at The Arlen Bystander and begins a new career as a real estate agent. Meanwhile, after Dale buys a set of titanium golf clubs at a police auction, he gives the clubs to Hank. However, Hank has trouble playing with a set of clubs that once belonged to a convicted murderer.

When Lucky wants to give Luanne the expensive wedding that she desires, he sues Dale with a frivolous lawsuit after having an accident on the job. After Lucky's lawyer finds out that Dale does not have insurance, he goes after Strickland Propane.

Stressed that her birthday parties never live up to her expectations, Peggy plans herself a disco-themed party on a mystery train, but after Luanne ruins the surprise, Peggy worries her parties will always end badly. However, a new mystery arises after a couple sneaks away for some private time in the train bathroom, and the partygoers must figure out who did it.

The Propane Hall of Fame is inducting Buck Strickland this year and he has asked Hank to come with him to make sure he stays out of trouble. This becomes a hard task after Buck meets his illegitimate son while at the event in Memphis.

Thankful to finally have something in common with his son, Hank is proud when Bobby’s knowledge of beef earns him a spot on a college team bound for the State Championships.