Father Mulcahy counsels a GI who is plagued by guilt because he has swapped tags with a dead colleague. Meanwhile, B.J. and Charles consider ways of keeping a soldier-salesman quiet.

Klinger buys a goat, with the intention of getting rich by selling it's milk. Then the goat eats the 4077th's $22,340 payroll, leaving paymaster Hawkeye holding the bag. Meanwhile, Charles also thinks he can make a killing when he sees an ancient vase.