After failing to be selected for the Renford Comprehensive school football team, Ben, Bruno & Jason are encouraged by the injured Stewart to form their own five-a-side team to play in the Renford Sunday League. But the three aren't pleased when the remaining players turn out to be Ronnie, who's a fashion victim, and Robin, who's a girl! Although they lose badly in their first match against the much feared Renford Razors, they acquit themselves well, as they manage to score the only goal the Razors have ever conceded.

When Bruno gets bullied by the Razors for being an Italian, Bruno decides to stand up for himself against the Razors but Eddie secretly helps him out and frightens the bullies by pretending to be Bruno's uncle, a mafia boss. Bruno is surprised to find that the Razors just want to serve him, until they recognise Eddie that is.

Tricked by the Rejects into thinking that he's got a ticket for QPR, Jason talks his way into the grounds and ends up trying to score a goal on the pitch at half-time against a footballing legend.

The Rejects decide to help lovestruck Ben and his poetry get noticed by Justine. Their advice is useless, but the poetry is a big hit.

Robin causes chaos when she uses her psychology training to give the Rejects a positive mental attitude to help them win some matches. Unfortunately her only effect is to make them feel better about losing.

When the Rejects stop listening to him, Stewart decides he doesn't want to be the coach anymore. Jason takes charge instead, but makes himself so unpopular the others beg Stewart to return.

Justine persuades Ben to go to ballet class with her, but his plans don't stay secret for long, when the rest of the team decide to turn up to see him in action.

When Jason is caught cheating to win a match against some real footballers, the Rejects end up with the bill at the Graceland cafe and have to sing for their supper.

After Ronnie runs out of money and has to hide from the people who bought tickets for the evening he's promoting, the Rejects end up being the star attraction at a karaoke night at Graceland, which Eddie organises.

When Jason gets two tickets to what they think is a big game, the Rejects take turns to worm their way into his good books to be the one who accompanies him. He accepts all the bribes, but then gives the tickets to Eddie and Priscilla.

After being humiliated by a real Italian girl, Bruno decides to go back to being his old self, plain Barry Grade. However, an encounter with his biggest (and only) fan, prompts him to become Bruno again.

Vinnie's father wants him to stop wasting time with the video camera and play cricket, but he's not good enough for the team. So he decides to make a video of the Rejects' season for a competition, instead.